What Can I Do if My Spouse is Trying to Alienate Me From My Children?

 Posted on August 18, 2022 in Family Law

While fiercely litigated divorces and heated child custody disputes were more common in the past, Illinois family courts today try to ensure all children are provided with opportunities to have warm relationships with both parents. Unless there is a good reason to do otherwise, the assumption is that both parents will be involved in a child’s life. While parents are encouraged to resolve parenting disputes on their own or with the help of a mediator, when a judge does have to get involved, one of the factors she can use to determine whether a parent is suitable to spend time with a child is the nature of the relationship between the child and parent and whether it is psychologically healthy for the child. 

What judges do not want to see is one parent going out of their way to psychologically alienate a child from their other parent. This phenomenon, known as “parental alienation,” is known to cause lasting harm to children and has the potential to permanently damage the relationship between a child and her parent. If you are concerned that your spouse is doing this to your child, it is important to take action as soon as possible. 

What is Parental Alienation, and What Does it Look Like? 

The term “parental alienation” is subject to some dispute. What is not disputed, however, is whether the behavior that is often described by the term sometimes exists and is damaging to children. The hallmark of typical parental alienation involves efforts by one parent to create a hostile relationship characterized by negative perceptions about the child’s other parent. Parents trying to alienate a child from each other may try to: 

• Draw the child into parenting disputes, deliberately pointing out how awful the other parent is

• Tell the child inappropriate details about past parental conflict 

• Badmouth the parent regarding the parent’s personal choices, job, parenting skills, or any other behavior 

• Maneuver the child so as to limit the contact she has with her other parent 

• Cause the child to fear and resent her other parent 

How Can I Prove My Ex is Alienating My Child From Me? 

Proving parental alienation can be difficult, as the behaviors are often subtle and hard to keep records of. The best thing a parent hoping to prove parental alienation can do is to begin keeping detailed records of suspicious behavior from either the child or the parent. If your child is repeating false stories (or even true stories that are inappropriate for your child to know about), write down the details and the dates. If your child suddenly stops communicating with you, blames you for everything, or refuses to go to scheduled parenting time, these may be signs that parental alienation is going on. For sure, any time your child’s other parent prevents you from contacting your child or seeing your child during scheduled parenting time, this should be documented. Sometimes a professional psychologist or custody evaluator may need to get involved. 

Get Help From a Wheaton, IL Parental Responsibilities Attorney

True efforts of parental alienation can have lasting harm on young children. If you are worried that your spouse is trying to prevent your children from having a loving relationship with you, take action before it is too late. Call the offices of The Stogsdill Law Firm, P.C. today to schedule a comprehensive consultation with a DuPage County parental responsibilities attorney and learn more about your options under Illinois law. Contact us at 630-462-9500. 

Source: 

https://www.ilga.gov/legislation/ilcs/ilcs4.asp?DocName=075000050HPt%2E+VI&ActID=2086&ChapterID=59&SeqStart=8675000&SeqEnd=12200000