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Recent Blog Posts
Dealing with Co-Parenting Stress, Conflict, and Contention
Raising children can be a difficult job, even in the best of situations. When parents live in different homes, have different beliefs or ideals, or disagree on how a child should be raised, parenting can become a contentious situation. To make matters worse, children can feel as though they are caught in the middle. As a result, they may lash out, become withdrawn, or suffer severe emotional trauma. Protect your child, save your sanity, and learn how you can reduce the stress of co-parenting with help from the following information.
Accountability and Boundaries
While most parents do want what is best for their child, there is a small fraction that seem to struggle with the accountability aspect of parenting. They may not understand the pain they cause when they do not show up for a scheduled visit or event. Some fail to recognize how not paying child support impacts their child's overall quality of life. Still others may behave in ways that create a cause for concern.
Who Has to Leave the House After the Divorce Starts?
When two people decide to get divorced, often they already live in different places. However, both spouses may still live in the family home after a divorce has been filed. Who has to leave the home once the divorce process is underway?
Issues of Property Ownership
Under the law of Illinois, generally, no one is required to leave the family home while the divorce is still underway. In Illinois, the family home is most likely marital property.
Until the court makes a final decision about the division of the assets, each spouse has an equal right to live in the house.
Petition for Exclusive Possession
One side can ask the court for exclusive possession of the home. This would mean that he or she has the legal right to require that the other spouse leave the house and live somewhere else. However, the petition for exclusive possession requires that the petitioning spouse submit evidence of domestic violence or abuse.
Financial Fraud in Divorce - What You Can Do to Protect Your Divorce Settlement
When going through divorce, most people would like to believe that their spouse still values their marriage enough to be honest and fair in their disclosure of assets and income. Unfortunately, this is not always the case. No one really knows how often it happens - after all, many do end up getting away with it - but the issue is common and one that you should be aware of. Learn more with help from the following information on financial fraud in divorce.
Types of Financial Fraud in Divorce
While some forms of financial fraud are more common than others, a spouse can become victim to one or numerous types throughout the course of their marriage or divorce. This can include tax fraud, asset dissipation, asset hiding, misappropriation of assets, forgery, loan fraud, insurance fraud, and more. Parties who are especially at risk are those that have not had an active role in the day-to-day financial management of the marriage. Even still, it is possible to spot the signs if you stay aware and know what to look for during your divorce.
Recent Study Offers Some Insight on Co-Parenting Hurdles and Ideas on How to Overcome Them
While every family and situation is different, studies show that children typically cope best with divorce when they have a continued and healthy relationship with each parent. Studies also indicate that it is parental conflict - not the divorce itself - that can have a negative impact on a child's future relationships as an adult. This means that parents must work together, regardless of their issues with one another. Unfortunately, this can be difficult when there are barriers. A recent study examined what these barriers might be, and how families may overcome them.
Current Programs Are Not Addressing Parental Concerns
More than half of all states have programs that help parents with successful co-parenting after divorce. Yet most focus on logistical concerns, such as how to deal with hectic work schedules or long distances and still spend time with a child. Unfortunately, these concerns may not be the creating rifts that many parents experience during and after the divorce process.
Coping with Divorce during the Holidays
Divorce is difficult at any time of the year, but it can feel especially overwhelming during the holiday season. You may find yourself feeling lonely, or missing certain traditions, or even yearning for time with your in-laws. Take heart: these painful feelings are completely normal, and they will eventually pass. In the meantime, the following can help you cope with your divorce during this holiday season.
Dealing with Family and Friends
Family and the holidays tend to go hand in hand, but it can be an added stressor when you are going through a divorce. This is especially true when you have family members who give unsolicited advice or do not seem to understand what you are going through. It is important to remember that, though they mean well, you do not have to share every detail about your life, or the divorce. Try letting them know that you would really rather not discuss the divorce during family gatherings, or take a close friend who can act as a buffer if things get too out of hand. If all else fails, consider turning down invites to events that you know might be triggering and spend time at home, taking care of yourself instead.
Talking to Your Children About Divorce
Once the decision to divorce has been made, couples must face the difficult task of telling those that they love. Young children, who are usually directly affected by the divorce, are often the ones that concern parents most. They may struggle with how to broach the subject, and often are afraid of what their child's reaction might be. Thankfully, there are some helpful tips that parents can use to discuss the impending change. The following are just a few.
Take Stock of Your Own Emotional State
Most parents recognize that children are often sensitive to their parent's emotion. For example, those who have children who were fussy as babies might remember that, when their babies would cry and they, as parents became stressed, the baby would seem to cry even more. Even if you have not experienced this as a parent, you may have seen it manifest in other ways.
Remembering this emotional thread between you and your child is critical when dealing with divorce matters. You must stop and consider your own emotional state and carefully take stock of how you are feeling before broaching the subject. If you find yourself extremely stressed or sad, practice some self-care or seek support first. Then, when you are feeling a little less on-edge, sit down and talk to your child. Chances are, you will both handle things much better then.
Divorce Challenges for Self-Employed, High Net Worth Individuals
While divorce is almost never simple, it can be extremely complicated for high net worth individuals, especially if they are also self-employed. The normal process for discovering assets and valuing marital property is often not adequate in these cases.
Verifying Income and Overcoming Suspicion
One of the primary purposes of divorce is to divide the marital property equitably between the two spouses. The first step is to decide what is marital property and what is separate property. When one spouse has a business or is self-employed, there is often a fight about what percentage of the business, if any, is marital property and how much the business is worth.
Even when the accounting has been properly done in a business, there can be difficulty determining the value of the business. The other spouse may be suspicious of the numbers being reported. Often, even a formal business valuation is not enough; a forensic accountant may be needed to help demonstrate the complete financial situation.
Making the Nesting Divorce Work for Your Family
When it comes to parenting after divorce, there are almost as many ways to do it a there are couples. Nesting - a fast growing trend - is just one. If it is something that you and your spouse are currently considering, you should first understand the advantages and disadvantages. Secondly, it is important to know how to make this post-divorce parenting model work for you. The following provides some tips.
What is the Nesting Divorce?
The nesting divorce is a model in which the children get the house and the parents rotate in and out to spend their allotted parenting time with their children. Some share an apartment outside the home to save on rent, or they may each have their own space. Nearly all make some serious sacrifices to make this divorce model work.
Nesting requires commitment to the arrangement, a level head, effective communication, and a lot of mutual respect. This, paired with the possibility of continued contention between parents, makes it one of the least favored divorce models. However, some families can and do make this option work and often find that it gives them and their children a way to slowly transition into a more permanent arrangement.
The "Destination Divorce" - A Revolutionary Way to Divorce, or a Disaster in the Making?
Divorce is an experience that most couples dread. It typically means weeks of preparing and negotiation, and it may even include an in-depth investigation into a spouse's financial assets and income. Many become contentious, which can make the process drag on even more. In short, it is a process that directly contradicts the convenience and instant gratification we are used to experiencing in our everyday lives.
Destination divorces are trying to change the face of divorce by offering "quick and easy" getaway weekends where couples check in married but check out divorced. It certainly sounds more appealing, but can a marriage really be dissolved in a weekend? Even if it can, should it be? More importantly, should you and your spouse pursue this option, or is it simply a disaster waiting to happen?
About the Destination Divorce
With one hotel location in Upstate New York and one expected in Los Angeles within the next year, the concept of a destination divorce is growing. Couples check in with a mediator or attorney and then get to spend their weekend negotiating and relaxing. The rooms are opulent, the experience is quasi romantic, and the end result is a dissolved marriage. Of course, there are some major disadvantages to pursuing divorce in this way, and it can be especially problematic four couples with a high net worth, issues with domestic violence, or major differences of opinion in matters relating to children.
As Awareness of Parental Alienation Grows, Protecting Children from Abuse Becomes More Difficult
Once upon a time, allegations of child abuse in family court cases were generally taken at face value. As a result, the alleged abusive parent was blocked off from their children, either through supervised visitation or through complete loss of parental rights. Then along came the concept of parental alienation - a situation in which one parent brainwashes the child and pits them against the other. It had been going on for years, and quickly became more recognized.
Today, it muddies the decision of whether allegations of abuse are real, or a well-crafted tactic to punish the other parent. Judges struggle to decide which is which. Some err on the side of caution. Others are skeptical when it comes to allegations of abuse. That can make outcomes of family law cases difficult to predict and, in some situations, could put a child at risk or punish an innocent parent. If you are going through divorce and have concerns over your child's safety, the following information can help you better understand what parental alienation is, and how it may affect your case.











